I start to get nervous about a month before. I have to stop myself from thinking about it. Sometimes, waiting to finish planning until the last minute helps.
What makes me so nervous that I start feeling a bit nauseated?
It's the annual conference hosted by Salesforce.com - filled with education sessions, technical assistance, vendor booths and seminars on the future of the platform.
Don't get me wrong. I love Salesforce. I love the platform and the community and the training sessions... as long as I am sitting at home snuggled up with my laptop or at my isolated desk at work.
You see, I'm an introvert. And one that has a constantly running internal monologue about why I suck at handling social situations. I enjoy being around people, but in moderation. Social interaction exhausts me mentally. I'd much rather type than talk.
So the idea of traveling somewhere I'm not familiar with (it's my fourth year attending... but still), to wander around Moscone with thousands (tens of thousands!) of people, many of whom I correspond with on Twitter (and whose names I will most likely forget when I see them face-to-face)... it scares me.
That hasn't stopped me from going to Dreamforce in years past. But, my lack of confidence and the doubts swarming in my brain, well, those never stop. And if you're thinking right now 'she seems pretty confident to me!', know this: I fake it well. I put on a show. And then I go back to the hotel and revel in being alone.
I'll be there next month.
I know it will be a great experience. It always is.
But, that doesn't stop me from feeling a bit anxious.
Jenna Baze is a rather geeky girl with average social skills and an affinity for: Google Apps, Salesforce.com, Pinterest, natural light photography and finding creative ways to avoid doing dishes (which includes updating a handful of blogs).
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